The best martial artists know how to exercise jishuku (自粛) or “self-restraint.” For the most part, Japanese culture is built upon this idea of restraint. We see this idea of restraint in not only Budo, but in Japanese art, culture, and daily life. One of the most widely unspoken words in Japanese is enryo (遠慮). To enryo means to hold back or refrain from doing something out of consideration for others. Restraint is the basis of most Japanese aesthetics, and we see it in things like wabi-sabi, mono no aware and shibui to name just a few. In Japanese culture, it is thought that a person who lacks self-restraint also lacks shuyo (修養) or “self-discipline.” The techniques in the martial arts can cause injury and even death and because of this lethalness, it needs to be tempered with discipline and restraint. That is why the martial arts is based upon self-restraint and self-discipline rather than indulgence. Joseph Campbell told this story about samurai self-restraint. He said, “Once, there was a samurai who was tasked with avenging the murder of his lord. After many years, he finally found this person and was ready to complete his task. As he drew his sword, the man spit in his face. The samurai became angry and realizing this, he sheathed his sword and walked away. The reason he spared the man’s life in that moment was because he was bound by oath to kill this man and killing him because he became angry would mean that he was only fulfilling himself in that moment.” In the martial arts, we learn restraint through etiquette, decorum, and kata. In class, students must show restraint by how much power or force they put into the technique. For teachers, what and how they teach needs to be balanced with self-restraint and self-discipline as well. By routinely practicing restraint, when the time comes, we can demonstrate restraint and show our true level. Regardless of the situation, everything in life and in the martial arts should be balanced out with restraint and self-discipline. At the highest level, the best martial artists demonstrate restraint, not indulgence. Just because we can doesn’t mean we should.
Today’s goal: In which ways can you exercise restraint today?
Watch this video to better understand self-control