The best martial artists ask for help. There are only two types of people who don’t need help: gods and liars. Gods aren’t people and they won’t or can’t ask for help and since none of us are gods and martial artists don’t lie, then even the best at times need sukedachi (助太刀) or “help.” Sukedachi means “help” or “assistance in a fight” but it directly translates as “Help with a big sword.” This could mean that the person needs assistance with a heavy burden or needs the help of someone with a big (or strong) sword. In the old days, a martial artist never spoke about their weaknesses, shortcomings, or needs. One reason for this was because a samurai was always supposed to be proud and as such the proverb goes: “A samurai, even when he has not eaten and is hungry, uses a toothpick like a lord.” Another reason for a person to be stoic was because Japanese society adheres to a group mentality mindset where the success or harmony of the group is valued over the individual and expressing one’s individuality would be considered selfish. The martial arts reason to hide one’s shortcoming was because it was thought that if others knew of our suki (隙) or “weaknesses,” then they would tsukeiru (付け入る) or “use it to their advantage” and defeat us. This martial mindset is understandable and even warranted to some degree. However, the way a modern martial artist looks at it is that a lower caliber martial artist tries to hide their shortcomings, situation, or circumstances. At this level, hiding openings is more about embarrassment. By asking for help or allowing people to see who they really are makes us feel uncomfortable and we think that it will make us appear weak. It is said that at a high level, a martial artist has no openings. By openly displaying their shortcoming, it takes makes the weakness into a strength because they are aware and are not ashamed or scared of it. Therefore, to admit that we need help demonstrates a high level of ability because to ask for help requires a certain amount of awareness, humility, and courage. One of the things which I love to hear is the sound of people rolling before and after class. In addition to the sound, what is especially wonderful is when people are practicing their rolls and a senior student is helping them. This before and after class interaction between students is a demonstration of the health of a dojo because it is an indication of the level of mutual collaboration, trust, and dedication. A person who doesn’t trust won’t ask and a person who is not dedicated will not help. A dojo is a special place where people come to grow together but that growth will only occur if the teacher and the students work together because as Henry Ford once said, “Coming together is a beginning; keeping together is progress; working together is success.” If you need help, don’t be afraid to ask. Asking for help doesn’t show that you are weak - it shows that you have the courage and humility to ask. That is why the best martial artists ask for help.
Today’s goal: Furuya Sensei used to say, “It is better to ask and bear a moment of shame, than not to ask and endure a lifetime of ignorance.”